After doing a workshop in Family Therapy I walked away with a whole lot of theory and approaches, however I needed a way to put it all together in a way that would flow with my work with families. My practice is strength based, so I wanted a tool that would support a family to have something they could hold onto that reflected their strengths, values, and goals long after I closed the case.
What came to mind was a Family Book, a beautiful book filled with worksheets we would slowly work through to capture the strong story of the family.
Who came before them, what were their stories, what values, beliefs and gifts did they pass on, what is the problem or behaviours now that is affecting the family. The sheets could be put into a display folder for the family to reflect on and go back to.
A timeline for a family and looking at the transition times of each family member may highlight the additional stressors affecting the family, such as a child moving into high school or a death in the family.
We know from Narrative Therapy the power of externalising the problem. By mapping it out, we are putting the problems down on paper and almost putting a boundary around them. We are having conversations with everyone in the family about what is going on for them, and who is doing what at each stage. There may be a particular time on the clock when the family's problem begins. With the family, the practitioner can ask about if the problem had a name, what would it be? What would the problem look like? How would you describe it? It's voice, colour, feeling?
The great Miracle Question, what purpose does it have in family work? It supports the family or parents to imagine a day, second, minute, hour without the problem. They can share with you how they would know the problem isn't there and what their partner or children would be noticing and doing differently. The family then has an idea of what a life without the problem looks like and opens the pathway for small changes to begin. They say that insanity is continually doing the same thing expecting the same results.
The Miracle Question could open the door to new possibilities of change, and lead to discussing SMART goals with the family.
These tools are just that tools, they may not all work with every family. Be selective in what works for you and each of your families your working with. Problem solving can require some creativity, hopefully these tools empower your clients to see their strengths and rewrite the deficit narrative that is holding them back from the life and goals they want!
Disclaimer
-
Resources do not substitute therapy and do not replace medical advice.